Thursday, September 13, 2012

Which is the REAL You?


             Do we genuinely know the true nature of those we spend our lives with? Whether we are in school, the workplace or in the every day world, we are destined to meet individuals who help teach us daily life lessons.  Being only seventeen, I obviously have not had the chance to encounter all the life lessons that will come my way.  I have experienced a few crucial lessons with the people I spend a great deal of time with almost everyday.  With, that being said, I have come to place people into three categories: genuine/straight forward, dishonest/two-faced, and absolute people-pleasers.

            It is difficult in this day and age to actually be blessed with genuine, straight forward friends, and it is the journey you take together, that confirms and binds the heart.

Friendship has assorted definitions to everyone and how devoted friends are to one another.  Friends don't always tell you what you want to hear, but because they are genuine and care about your well being, they interject their views and chance losing friendships. They stand with you through the good and bad times, through sickness and health and always keep the integrity of the relationship strong.  They are the individuals in your life that you should know, don't ask, if you really don't want the truth, yet they are always on your side and no matter what, they stand with you.  More than not, these people are ones you can call your family and love you above all else and you hope this family will grow with time and commitment.

            What is sad about today's world is the abundance of people who can pull off the "fake face" without hesitation or a thought of another's feelings.  Those who fall into this category most likely come to you when they need something, or are your "fair weather friends" for a while until they get what they want.  They are nice to your face, but behind your back they gossip badly about you, undermine you and don't care at all, and tend to be users, manipulators and rarely demonstrate having a conscience.  It seems to be a contest, to always be ahead of everyone else, to be better than the next person, to always be right.  They have to have the most expensive or a fashionable material thing, which overshadows what I know to be real people, living the life we are all intended to live.

            The most exasperating sort, in my opinion, is the people-pleaser.  It is safe to say, you can't make everyone happy all the time, no matter how hard you try. Yet regardless of the situation or subject matter, the fake smile appears and the answer is always sure.  Sacrificing themselves to make certain that everyone, even a complete stranger, thinks they are perfect, kind, and inclined to do their biding.  Unable to say "No", or living with the constant fear of displeasing someone else, when they sacrifice the very people who are closest to them to please others who are insignificant in their lives.  Saying "No', doesn't mean you don't care, or don't love, it just means "No".

            One of the truest quotes I have come upon is this one by Eleanor Roosevelt: "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent," and how spot on she is.  I have experienced a variety of people in my short life.  I consider all people to be more than what they are like on the outside. I am not one to judge a book by its cover, even though we all label the people who share our world, including ourselves.  But in spite of what others may think of you, you know yourself better than any one person on this planet, and self-honesty is usually the best policy.  We all must learn that when we label others from the outside, it makes us seek the knowledge of ourselves from the inside.  

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